Monday, July 29, 2013

Ramadhan at the Hospital

Assalamualaikum & Good Day dear readers (^_^)...

It's been a while since i wrote something in this little blog of mine. A lot has happened lately during this month of Ramadhan. We are nearing the end of Ramadhan as we know, so, i hope all of you are all geared up for the hunt of Malam Lailatul Qadar.(^_^). I wish you all the best and may Allah SWT bless all of you.

During the middle of Ramadhan, (last week) I accompany my grandmother (the one on my father's side) at the hospital. She was schedule to undergo for angioplasty. Angioplasty, what i am told is a technique of widening narrowed or obstructed arteries. They use this kind of a balloon catheter to get through the narrowed position and then inflated to a suitable size using water pressure (something like that).  This is to ensure that the vessels remains open and will allow for blood circulation to flow normally. Previously during the month of May, she was admitted due to health problems. She is a diabetes carrier and yeah, it does bother me at times.
Le Hospital
the long hallway to the vascular ward

Grandma sleeping

The view from where i sit
Ramadhan at the Hospital.... it brings me back memories... because, last year i also spent half my Ramadhan at the Hospital when my late grandmother (the one on my mother's side) was still alive. Although it saddens me a little but still, I try to be calm. Grandma was admitted to the vascular ward on level 3. A lot of my family members never really like going to the Hospital but not me. I love the Hospital very much because it holds many memories of me and my late grandmother plus, my late grandfather (the one on my mother's side) was once an attendant. I guess i picked up my love of the Hospital very much from them huh?(-.-,)..

I'm always curious about how things are and yes, just about everything. The Hospital is also one of them. Believe me, I got a chance to secretly explore a little bit of this and a little bit of that during my time inside the hospital. Grandma (the one on my father's side) was schedule to undergo her angioplasty on Thursday. She had to come early so she was admitted on Tuesday so that the doctors and nurses can prepare for the procedure perfectly in time. Besides, she had to get her blood, sugar level and also other things concern, checked. My cousin and her mom were with us there. Because the vascular ward was situated near the Paediatric ICU only a few people may come in. They're even strict about visiting hours because only  one or two people can go in to see the patient. The reason is if too many people come in they might disturb other patients who needs their rest.

It was a long wait for one bed to become vacant. Due to the increasing number of patients, we were facing problems because during that time no beds were vacant. Luckily, one of the patients was schedule to be discharge that day so all matters solved =) The interesting part about the ward to me is i get to see many things, particularly patients and their illness. I'm curious about that too. The patient in front of my grandmother was suffering from heart problems while the one next  her was going to undergo for dialysis the very next day. The nurses during the morning and afternoon shift are all very helpful and friendly people. I enjoy their company and i also learned a thing or two about how to insert the branula for the water drip. (^_^)...

Watching how the nurse place the branula. Serious, i'm not scared.. =)

Grandma's doctor and the matron in front

You see, being in the hospital gives me a great sense of how content a person should be. Health is a very important gift from Allah SWT. This is because, without it how can you run your daily activities? in worst cases, it may affect your dakwah.... Ingat 5 perkara sebelum 5 perkara... That is why, prevention is better than cure. You have to have a healthy lifestyle if you want to succeed in this lifetime. Without a good body you are just like a soul floating here and there, even if you have a body to begin with. Allah SWT already gave you brains to think and to decide. The rest is up to us to choose what is right and know what is wrong for us. May he continue to guide us to the righteous path, the path where His blessing lies within. Amin...

Back to the story, on thursday grandma was schedule to go to the operation theater in the afternoon. I had trouble sleeping because it was soooo uncomfortable since i had to sleep on the floor. Not to mention the vascular ward is fully air conditioned. Eeek! soooo cold (>_<).... Serves me right for not bringing extra thick socks. I couldn't sleep during the night because the baby on the next ward kept on crying so i decided to do some writing instead. Morning comes and i was too sleepy that i swear the some of the doctors and nurses probably giggled as they saw how i slept with my head on a small pillow leaning against the cupboard. Gosh! that was embarrassing (-_-'')...

I tried to stay awake so got up and told grandma that i needed to get some fresh air. I walked here and there all around the hospital (to get rid of the sleepiness within). I got to see another perspective of the places i set my foot at. I looked through the glass door near the front counter of the hospital and saw a lot of people queuing and awaiting their turn for their names to be called. I guess they must have come for appointments and all. (-.-,). I walked around the clinic, passed a few grocery shops and pharmacy until i then seated To myself near the ward building entrance.

To tell you the truth, i sometimes feel a little calm when i am at the hospital more than i am at home. I'm so very fascinated with everything i see and learn to the part it got me to continue writing my manuscript back (despite having no table or computer with me). Good thing i bought  along my small book in my hand bag. It's important for me to get and gain as much information and experience as possible so that i can pour them all into my writings. Besides that, it's a good way as well for me to perfecting my drawing and writing skills. I love drawing what i see and what i experience. During the past weeks i was so stuck up inside my house and I guess, i seemed to have lost my muse for a while back then and  i guess being in the hospital made it alive once more. Hmm... me and my writings (^_^) I called it a writer's paradise

Writing, and more writing

I still remember, because it was near to sahur time, i did not buy or made anything to eat.(0_0) I decided to venture walk outside alone to buy some food at the hospital department store situated downstairs. The hallway and the road that reaches the elevator was so quiet that it can send chill down to the spine. Next to the elevator was a long and dark road to the cancer ward. The cold temperature of the wee hours of the morning nearly made me having brain freeze. There was no one there except me. It was scary but i kept myself calm. Come to think of it, it was pretty of a suspense experience actually ;) I go down and ate some porridge for sahur. Alhamdulillah, all praises is to Allah SWT. My grandmother's operation went well and she's back at home and looking healthy. She nags a lot too, hehe.  I am content with what i have and very much thankful to Him for all the things that happened so far. I get to learn and see how a dressing was conducted by the nurse too. I took a picture of my grandmother's wound but its unwise for me to post the photo here.

during the specialist & other doctors ward round. Uncle and aunt paid a visit :)

The discharge pharmacy. just recently known about it though :) ouh, I see raya decorations is in place

Anyways, that's all that i could write for now. I have to go and help my little sister doing her art project in which will be handed tomorrow morning.  In Shaa Allah, I'll try to update soon.. till then dear readers =)

Wasalamualaikum

Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Ahlan Ya Ramadhan... =)

Assalamualaikum & Good Day Dear Readers (^_^)




Alhamdulillah, All praises to Allah for He has given the chance for us to meet the blessed month, the month of Ramadhan. I take this opportunity to wish all Muslimin & Muslimah all around the world no matter far or near, Selamat Menyambut Ibadah Ramadhan (Happy Blessed Ramadhan). Now, I know that fasting (Puasa) might be hard for some people but believe me, that's the joy of it. 

Ramadhan is not only about fasting  from dawn to sunset but Ramadhan holds a more deeper meaning. Allah SWT made fasting during the month of Ramadhan an obligation to us. As stated in the Holy Qur'an:

The month of Ramadhan is that in which was revealed in the Qur’an, guidance for mankind, and a clear proofs of guidance, and the criterion (of right and wrong). And whoever so you is present, let him fast a month, and whoever so you is sick on a journey or a number of days, Allah desires for you to ease; He desires not hardships for you, and that you should complete the period, and that you should magnify Allah for having guided you and that perhaps you may be thankful
(Surah Al-Baqarah: 185)

Ramadhan is about the improvement of one self in their worship to Allah SWT. When Ramadhan begins, the gate of Jannah (Paradise) are opened and the gates of Hell are closed. Take this opportunity to improve ourselves to become a better person, cleansed our heart and soul by involving ourselves plus, do good deeds to gain (Pahala) by doing various activities such as learn more about Ramadhan, the beauty and benefits of it, joining the tarawih prayers, recite the Qur'an, give charity, wake up in the middle of the night and perform solat Tahajjud. Oh,  and take the opportunity to perform Solat Sunat Hajat as well (^_^) but mostly, do these things to gain the blessings from Allah SWT. May our worship to Him, Allah SWT blessed.

You can apply this tips for your mission in complete reading the whole Qur'an (^_^)
One of the wonderful things about the month of Ramadhan is it's a good chance for us to clear your mind from all the unwanted clutters in life and fill them with nothing but good things. Do what it takes for us to organize ourselves during this holy month such as, keeping works in order, stay energized by organizing a healthy lifestyle and make your time for Allah. Believe me, you'll be amazed by the results later on.

Another interesting thing about Ramadhan is the nights of a thousand nights, The Lailatul Qadr. (^_^) Lailatul Qadar is the nights of all nights better than a thousand months. It's also is the day where our Prophet Muhammad SAW receives the very first revelations of the Qur'an send by Allah SWT  through the Angle Jibril (Peace be upon him). There is no specific dates on when will Lailatul Qadr night will appear. Mostly it is on one of the odd nights. Wallahualam.  Anyways, you can take this opportunity to wake up at night and pray to Allah SWT. Who knows? You might just be lucky that you might come across the nights of a thousand nights.(O.O,)



Verily! We have sent it (this Qur'an) down in the night of Al-Qadr (Decree)

And what will make you know what the night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is?

The night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is better than a thousand months 
.
Therein descend the angels and the Ruh [Jibrael (Gabriel)] by Allah's Permission with all Decrees,

Peace! (All that night, there is Peace and Goodness from Allah to His believing slaves) until the appearance of dawn.

(Surah Al-Qadr: 1 - 5)

Allah SWT does not burden his servants. For those who cannot fast (Those who are ill to the extreme, women who are having their period, pregnant ladies or nursing mums, patients that are sick with an incurable disease, can also do their part. You still have the power of Doa. Never forget that... Allah SWT hears your prayers more than you know it. You can do your part by doing many various good deeds or activities aside fasting such as feeding the poor, do charity, dakwah and all things that can gain the blessings of Allah SWT.

Selamat Menyambut Ibadah Puasa. Bersihkan hati sucikan diri Tingkatkan Iman dan segala amal ibadah untuk meraih sebuah dunia dan akhirat yang berjaya. Semoga segala amal ibadah kita pada bulan Ramadhan yang mulia ini diterimaNya sekaligus mendapat keredhaan, kemuliaan dan rahmat darinya.. Amin Ya Rabb...

Till then dear readers... Wasalamualaikum...=)



Sunday, June 9, 2013

What's Next?

Assalamualaikum & Good Day dear readers (^_^)

Woot!! After a long break and availability of internet connection, I'm back! Many things happen recently, well, so so lah. Last month i received my final exam result. Alhamdulillah, All praises is for Allah SWT. I passed!!!!  (^____________________^) (Senyum tu adalah lebar sikit) hehe..

Anyways, I can finally put my head to rest. Or so i thought....

Life after finish studying is quite hard and I do have to say, for the past weeks I'm quite stressed about it. It hit me at that moment i realize that I did not prepare anything yet for the upcoming future. Well, all i can blame is myself for too busy handling reports and presentation. But that's not the issue i want to say here. The words "What's next for me" haunts me for quite a while actually. I want to find work but many people around me tell me that its better to continue degree..

Planning for the future lies a very big responsibility and i have to say, I'm a little afraid of that (Aside where my mother usually nags me on what i really want to do almost every day till one moment i cannot stand it anymore. I walk and went to the kitchen and do what i do best. Cook possibly anything to lessen her lectures).

I still have yet to figure out what i want to do for the time being. All i can hope and pray for is, may the choice that i make later can bring me closer to Allah SWT and also benefit others and myself. I like helping people and even dad said that he does not care on what i want to do as long as i like what i'm doing. All in all, i wish for good things to happen in my life...

In Shaa Allah... Semuanya tak lain tak bukan, hanyalah untuk mendapat keredhaan Allah SWT dalam apa jua yang dilakukan... :) Lakukan lah yang terbaik dalam banyak perkara bukan untuk mendapat pujian atau membina sukses akan tetapi, supaya dapat memanfaatkan diri dan orang lain..

Wasalamualaikum...

Friday, April 19, 2013

Till we meet again...


Assalamualaikum & Good Day everyone....

After a long haitus i'm back!!. Really, i need to update this blog of mine. The last month of practical training was not so bad but not so good either. But i believe that everything happen is the will of Allah SWT and there are reasons things happen...

March was the last month of my practical training and the boy it was tough consider that i'm  the only practical student left in my department. So there were a lot of errands and this and that. But no matter, i'm quite used to the busy life now anyways. The only thing that keeps me wondering whenever i return home is.. what's the next step?

I only realize that after practical training, i will no longer be a student anymore as i will be graduating soon. (Been busy with reports and all, didnt have time to think about anything much) Graduate.... the moment i've been waiting my whole diploma life... ''What's the next step'' It haunts my head for quite a while. Its not that i don't want to continue my studies but considering my family's financial situation and i am now jobless, it's going to be hard. My three siblings are still studying, one is doing degree while the other two is still schooling. Plus, the both of them will sit for a big examination by the end of the year, SPM & PMR.

I want to find work for the time being. One thing I've learned so far regarding the working world and finding a job..it is NEVER EASY. If it was easy, then there will be 100% employment already! But its not... (Sigh~~) i try not to let this kind of matter get to me. I will get a job somehow and if not, i'll start my own business :) I like being my own boss anyways... hehe..

Anyways, back to the last month during practical training, it was fun while it last, the first week, my friend went overseas to pursue his studies while another friend of mine went back to campus. I had to run errands and went up and down the stairs to the file room. (Ya Allah.. i miss that moment). Everyone in the office were helpful and it makes me reallys sad that my practical training will end soon. My boss? well he's okay. Though he was sad that soon there will be no one to help with the workload in the office. I'm kinda relief a little but at the same time i'll miss the work there. I love the working environment at the organization i am working. Although there are some stressful events but in the end, there is always something to smile and laugh about. We had a little farewell party in the office and i was asked to say a few words. My firend cried when it was her turn to give a speech. We had a nice farewell party and in the end of the day, i bid everyone in every section from level one to three goodbye.

For what is worth, Everything that i do, i do it with all my heart. I'm going to miss everyone in the office. Everyone had been very helpful and nice to me, although some aren't, I forgive and pray for the best of you guys anyways :) I pray that May Allah SWT bless all of them in the organization and may the achieve success in the future. Goodbye dear friends! until we meet again next time.

~Special message~ ....To the nice you...

I had always thought you were the insensitive one. But still, in a good one at that.  It was selfish of me to hope something that i do not know whether it will happen or not. But all in all, i just want you to know one thing. Up till now, i was very sincere towards you. I hope you realize it one day and i hope that it still not too late for you to notice that all these years i never stop praying for you. We are getting older but even if ten or twenty years passed... the feeling in my heart will always be the same. I pray that may Allah SWT bless you here in the world and the hereafter. I will always pray for the best of you.... always. Although it's hard to let the memories go, but i believe Allah SWT has even better things for me than i have for myself. If by chance, we should meet... I do hope you remember me... a smile from you is good to. Just like ever since we were young. I pray that may Allah SWT look after both of us. If my time comes, pray for me. For all those years, I pray to him that one day, we will all be reunited in his garden of paradise.. In Shaa Allah. I thank Allah SWT for everything. He still gives me life and i get to meet you again. I am glad to see you're doing rather well than me... truly i am. 

Ya Allah... Lindungilah dia... 
Setiap langkahnya, setiap hela nafasnya, setiap kelip matanya, setiap degupan jantungnya... 
Banyak yang ingin kupohon dan kuharapkan untuk dia...
Tapi Ya Allah... Jikalay satu sahaja yang dimakbulkan olehMu...
Lindungilah Iman di hatinya..
Kerana dengan iman yang ada, dia pasti selamat di dunia dan akhirat.... :')

Till then dear readers.... 

P/S: here's a few pictures i took during that month... enjoy :)

 
My Friend's boss. My boss was not present due to outstation. 

The ladies of the Education Department (^_^) I'm gonna miss them all soooo much

Ah, the lovely people of level two (exept the lady in the end on the right. She's on level three) Bye everyone! untill we meet again. Andy, the guy over there, i heard from my friend that he went to pursue his studies. He left the office one week after i did. The lady with the spectacles in white, her name is nearly has the same pronounciation as mine. Nice! :) they always say that i look like her. found it a bit true..:)

My former boss and colleage. Miss them both very much. Although it was a short notice, i feel as if we're close already. My former Head of Section is having a third child on the way. I pray for her and her baby (^_^) May they both be blessed.
Its tradition that when one leaves this office, especially for practical students or if one feels like writing a note, we are asked to write something to hung on the friendship tree (below). I wanted to make something special for my department. I love to draw so i drew a little bit of this and that. Mind you, pictures are worth a thousand words. (^_^)... Good luck to the repayment section. I pray that may the work be finished quick and burden be lessen... Thank you for your hospitality and all the knowledge you share with me. I learned a lot from everyone. Keep in touch! love you guys so much

ze friendship tree. me thinks.... it needs TLC.. seriously, it looked more like two spinal cord  tied up but with added bones attached. too uncreative. I hope they will consider a creative way to hung these messages. Instead of a tree, why not a blackboard? they can design it in any ways they want. Merapu pulak!!.. hehe.. I should have place this problem in my suggestion column...


This view, i miss is sooo much as it always accompany me whenever i wait for my mom to pick me up before i go home.. really love the view. although not really the same when nigtfalls. one wish they were never there during the night. believe me... i know so...

I guess... this would praobably the view i miss the most. There is a sofa in the lobby and i usually sat there instead of waiting outside. this is always the view i see. (The song sang by  Heora - the moonlight is setting accompanied me always while i wait to go home) Beautiful memories happen here sometimes for me. It makes me want to cry whenever i look at it. waitng....and waiting...and  waiting.... it doesnt matter.... I'll wait.... Cukuplah Allah bagiku dan Dia maha mengerti apa yang dilalui hati ini...Hanya kepadaNya aku berserah atas segala-galanya...

(sigh) as usual... for over three months now.... i am always the last person to go home. But during this time, it was not the usual. Apparently my mother had to extend her work. The guards had to close the office and i had to wait outside all alone in the dark. It was a little scary but still, i'm kinda use to it. My mom arrived around 8:15 p.m. Wow... that would probably be the longest one rather than the usual 7:05 p.m

Thank you to kak Mul for this lovely gift (^_^) hehe, I'll cherish and keep it good. I really like the design and craftof this keychain though. its lovey and cute!


Saturday, March 2, 2013

Mahou No Kotoba...


Assalamualaikum & Good Day dear readers....

Time...It always gets me every single minute. Sometime I wish that it would go rather slowly but at times, I do wish for it to be fast.

Time is very limited compared to the things that you want to do and to the things that you have to do.

Since the start of practical training, I always wonder what can I gain from here. So far, I acquire many experiences but still… I still feel that there something missing. I think I know very much what that is but I cannot write it here because I’m afraid that the mentioned one might be amongst the readers.

The thing is, to me time is always so short. My late grandmother always says that do not be cheated by time. I always remember her words every time if there is responsibilities needed to be done.

It has been good here though there were some tear jerking moments. Not because of work load but a friend of mine finished undergo her training and is now back in her homeland. I really miss her very much. Our section is always noisy with her and another colleague of mine usually yick yacking in the wee hours of the morning.

Another news came up that another colleague of mine will be leaving soon to further his studies. Things seemed to get a little quiet in my practical life. But still, it’s life. The wheels of life is slowly turning and there are people that comes and goes in one’s life. The most important thing is we do not forget them. Once you met someone, you never really forget them. I wish them both all the best in the world and he hereafter. Amin…

I am left with only three more weeks before returning to campus for  the last phase of my practical training in which I will be giving a presentation to the evaluators that will evaluate me and my friends later. It’s scary and nerve wrecking but in the end it all will come to pass.

I can’t help to say that I do.. am going to miss diploma life. The memories that happen within these five long years is indeed a blessing from Allah SWT to me. The silly times, the good ones, the bitter ones and many more have taught me a lot. Heck, I gained a lot of experience too. But most of all, I’m glad that it’s finally over. My waiting will be over soon and I will be able to move with my life just like any human in this world. All I hope and pray that May Allah SWT bless with his kindness,  and have mercy upon me and my family and everyone during our lifetime this world and the hereafter.

To You….

Words cannot express on how much I am very contend to Allah SWT for having me to meet you once more after all my years of separation from you. Truly, I am grateful…

When I see you again it reminds me how the world is small and how powerful Allah SWT is in our life. When I see you again, it made me believe that miracles do happen. If it is the will of Allah SWT for us to meet then we will meet again but if so writes the will of Allah SWT that we do not meet anymore, I pray that may we be reunited in His Garden of Paradise. By that time, I wish to see you smile to me like you are now.
I apologize if during our meeting and the encounters we go through, I have hurt your feelings. Forgive me my dear for I never meant to hurt or make you cross. I forgive you when you make me sad and confused with my own self. Your existence in my life means a lot to me and I am truly…truly….grateful to Allah SWT…

If by chance we meet again, I hope to see you smile.

Its almost the end of the month of February… I hope and pray that may all goes well after this for time is always clicking and will pass us by soon. From here on I'll work hard and try to be a better person. Anyways, life must go on. 

Here are some of the pictures that i took to all that had happen during the two months before. After all, pictures worth a thousand words.  Enjoy :)



Really miss these two very much. Kak, Selamat Maju Jaya (^_^)!!!

My friend the one with the green scarf is transfered to another organization. So you can say it's a bit lonely for me

Ustaz Don datang ke kuching (^_^). Really grateful to be able to meet him in person though

Kak Aiza's last day in sarawak before she goes home the day after.

New found friend to keep me company in the office :)

The month of February also happens to be the month of sports. Our organization had a sports competition in Johor. although we did not gain first place in overall games but we do win a few medals. That's good enough for me

Just some random pics that i took. These are some of the practical students in the organization that undergo practical training as well. I'll be finishing in March but they will finish around May.

I love these biscuits. The only thing i'm missing is the icing to place it all together neatly.. hehe

Monthly Assembly. We have a new officer joining the organization and up here is the celebration of the staffs birthdays for the month of January.
Chinese New Year Celebration after the monthly assembly (^_^)

Two of the practical students are my juniors. Next to them is kak Fiza from the accounts department.
The look of cuteness that no one can resist XD!!!
He's one of the staff's nephew.





These two are always bickering or more to say, friendly fight. But this happens to be their last day in the office so i'm a bit sad actually. The both of them will be furthering their studies. One of them will be going back to campus while the other will be heading to Indonesia. I wish them all the success in life and the hereafter. May they be bless by Allah SWT.... Hurm.... I won't be hearing anyone bickering anymore from behind. It's going to get lonely but then again i think i'll do just fine.



So far so good, I'm doing fine. I did silently cried when they left. Although i cannot say that things are going smooth but there are happy days. Things are going to be a little busy at the moment for the repayment section since we are short of people. It's alright, we can overcome all obstacle in our way if we just believe in ourselves. I do have to say though that it will be very lonely indeed since one by one they moved on while i'm the only one left. Two more weeks then i will be the one moving on. 

Well till then dear readers... I'll finish this entry with one song dedicated to kak Aiza, Kak bara, Syakinah, Alif and Nana. Till we meet again :)


I force myself…
To hide these overflowing feelings
Once again today
I could only look off the distance
Holding tightly
To the little things we talked about
I am able to live somehow

Magical words
That the only two of us know
We dream
Though we didn’t have the time
Recalling the funny times, makes me happy
We’ll meet again, there’s no need for the promises

I collapse into a deep sleep
Then awake in tears
Like a song whispered in a crowd
What are you doing?
I want to see your smile
I raised my hands and threw my selfish ways to the sky

Magical words
Seems so short when spoken
But they lead to something
So wonderful
Nobody knows
Even if they did the magic won’t fade
Though we have to wait for the day we share the rest of the story

The flowers are so beautiful
Even the thorns are beautiful
The roots should be beautiful too

Magical words
That the only two of us know
We dream
Though we didn’t have the time
Recalling the funny times, makes me happy
We’ll meet again, there’s no need for the promises

We’ll meet again, we’ll meet again
 
(Spitz - Mahou no Kotoba)

Two more weeks to go...


It's been a while, but i'm afraid i have not so much words to say. Many things has happened lately. But for this entry i'll just let the lyrics below do the talking... These two lyrics contains many meanings...

Heora - The moonlight is setting (The moon that embraces the sun OST)

On nights when the wind blows
I softly close my eyes
It feels like you are right next to me
Wordlessly, I follow you and walk
Although every day,
I can’t even approach you step by step

The moonlight is setting,
A black moon is setting in my heart
It resembles me, who can’t say anything
If I long for it so much and call out and call out
It’s a memory that became blackened ash

A cold darkness is falling down
A small star is rising
I call out to you several times a day but
Why can’t I hear an answer?
When I approach you
step by step, you get further

The moonlight is setting,
A black moon is setting in my heart
It resembles me, who can’t say anything
If I long for it so much and call out and call out
It’s a memory that became blackened ash

My foolish trust just gets bigger
I hate my increasing expectations
I hate my splitting heart
Help me, help me
Help this heart that is
only filled with unhappiness

The moonlight is setting,
A black moon is setting in my heart
It resembles me, who can’t say anything
If I long for it so much and call out and call out
It’s a memory that became blackened ash

The moonlight is setting,
A black moon is setting in my heart
It resembles you, who I long for so much
If I long for it so much and call out and call out
It’s a memory that became blackened ash
It becomes blackened tears that are falling


Baek Ji Young - After a long time (Rooftop Prince OST)

The talks we had as we looked at each other
The stories that only we knew
I guess I can’t erase them,
I can’t throw them away,
I can’t forget them
I look around these streets for the first time in a while
Whenever I pass this street, the good memories
They keep floating up in my head so I stop my footsteps
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
How about you?
The people look only happy
It seems like I’m the only one left in loneliness
I try to pretend that I’m not
but I keep thinking of you
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
Tears fall
If I wait here,
will I be able to see you?
Then will I be able to tell you
how I feel right now?
Because I miss you, because I am missing you
That’s how I am, I only know you
Living without you makes me filled
with regret about everything
Because you’re not here,
because there are so many empty things
Again today, I long for that spot and
my footsteps won’t move and I call out to you
- See more at: http://kromanized.com/2012/03/23/%EB%B0%B1%EC%A7%80%EC%98%81baek-ji-young-%ED%95%9C%EC%B0%B8-%EC%A7%80%EB%82%98%EC%84%9Cafter-a-long-time-romanizedtranslated-lyrics/#sthash.Lcg314c8.dpuf
The talks we had as we looked at each other
The stories that only we knew
I guess I can’t erase them, I can’t throw them away, I can’t forget them
I look around these streets for the first time in a while
Whenever I pass this street, the good memories
They keep floating up in my head so I stop my footsteps

After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing, I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories – they fall like stars
How about you?

The people look only happy
It seems like I’m the only one left in loneliness
I try to pretend that I’m not but I keep thinking of you

After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing, I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories – they fall like stars
Tears fall

If I wait here, will I be able to see you?
Then will I be able to tell you how I feel right now?

Because I miss you, because I am missing you
That’s how I am, I only know you
Living without you makes me filled with regret about everything
Because you’re not here, because there are so many empty things
Again today, I long for that spot and my footsteps won’t move and I call out to you

The talks we had as we looked at each other
The stories that only we knew
I guess I can’t erase them,
I can’t throw them away,
I can’t forget them
I look around these streets for the first time in a while
Whenever I pass this street, the good memories
They keep floating up in my head so I stop my footsteps
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
How about you?
The people look only happy
It seems like I’m the only one left in loneliness
I try to pretend that I’m not
but I keep thinking of you
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
Tears fall
If I wait here,
will I be able to see you?
Then will I be able to tell you
how I feel right now?
Because I miss you, because I am missing you
That’s how I am, I only know you
Living without you makes me filled
with regret about everything
Because you’re not here,
because there are so many empty things
Again today, I long for that spot and
my footsteps won’t move and I call out to you
- See more at: http://kromanized.com/2012/03/23/%EB%B0%B1%EC%A7%80%EC%98%81baek-ji-young-%ED%95%9C%EC%B0%B8-%EC%A7%80%EB%82%98%EC%84%9Cafter-a-long-time-romanizedtranslated-lyrics/#sthash.Lcg314c8.dpuf

The talks we had as we looked at each other
The stories that only we knew
I guess I can’t erase them,
I can’t throw them away,
I can’t forget them
I look around these streets for the first time in a while
Whenever I pass this street, the good memories
They keep floating up in my head so I stop my footsteps
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
How about you?
The people look only happy
It seems like I’m the only one left in loneliness
I try to pretend that I’m not
but I keep thinking of you
After a long time, I am here right now
Because I long for that time,
Though I tried to live without knowing,
I keep thinking about it
That’s how I am, it keeps coming into my eyes
The times we spent together, the memories -
they fall like stars
Tears fall
If I wait here,
will I be able to see you?
Then will I be able to tell you
how I feel right now?
Because I miss you, because I am missing you
That’s how I am, I only know you
Living without you makes me filled
with regret about everything
Because you’re not here,
because there are so many empty things
Again today, I long for that spot and
my footsteps won’t move and I call out to you
- See more at: http://kromanized.com/2012/03/23/%EB%B0%B1%EC%A7%80%EC%98%81baek-ji-young-%ED%95%9C%EC%B0%B8-%EC%A7%80%EB%82%98%EC%84%9Cafter-a-long-time-romanizedtranslated-lyrics/#sthash.Lcg314c8.dpuf