Saturday, November 19, 2016

Of life before and then for the future...

Assalamualaikum & Good Day To You Dear Readers...

It's been a while since i last write something in this half empty blog of mine. Well, earlier this year I've been rather busy with my final year project and all. In the middle of the year, i', battling by making a thesis as well as presentation. Alhamdulillah, i managed to pull it through with good scores =) (Thank god)...

Looking back at everything so far, its been a great and bitter sweet journey for me. I owe it all to Allah... The good, the bad, and everything else.... There are reason why things happen and its purpose is something we might not actually understand now, but in time, we will...

I am, safe to say right now actually, in my final semester for degree. For the past three months now, i am undergoing internship training at a local healthcare facility. To tell you the truth, my qualifications are nowhere near medical. Its more toward management actually. Why a healthcare facility of all places my supervisor asked? Let's just say that i am making up for the things I've lost along the way. A lot of my classmates picked a company or organization that pays. I on the other hand, was the only one that didn't.

Originally, i didn't pick the degree that i'm doing now but i actually set on a health management related degree. I only had to change it because my parents sort of forced me. Oleh kerana tak mau ingkar dengan Ibu Bapa, i did as they told me to.

For once, i want to do things I want and not my parents or anyone will stop me... and, i'm glad i managed to do it... i did it.

Life at the healthcare facility isn't boring but it its not exactly entertaining either. It's a bit of a both really. There are days where its a happy day and there are days where you just get the blues. Well, being an intern i don't really get to do much except to assist the officers in charge to do various management related things. The reason is there are also things that outsiders are not meant to touch or do. Confidential stuff. How am i to write my log book if i don't do any work? Well, my solution is easy, instead of waiting for work to come to me, i will find the work. From there i try to learn as much as i can. At the same time, i have another final report to finish and a system to be made.

Good thing I managed to create an easy system for the department i was attached. I was lucky enough as well to learn from the experts and other staff from other department as well. If i can't do much work here, I will learn by asking questions. To me it's okay to be stupid for five minutes rather than being ignorant for life. Internship isn't only about learning new things or gain knowledge. The experience you get is priceless. I learned a lot from it. Other than that, the joy of helping people and to see their smiling face... it's priceless.

I'm fascinated with the healthcare world be it management and medical and the experience i gain was more than enough. I also get to see how things work and handled and how a healthcare facility is run. People here work together as a team and  as a team, we are acquire to achieved the goals of the organization. The more i learn the more i am fascinated by the things around me here. I don't really mind people calling me peculiar for smiling and in awed of just practically about everything all the time. I don't mind becase... I'm where i want to be.

I never felt this way before. It made me question of all the things that i do for the past few years. Why did i chose this degree? why didn't i follow what i wanted? I know what i wanted....Some things are just meant not to be answered. Now, is not the time to wonder but a time for intervention. I'm not getting any younger and at least before i die i want to be able to do something that i'm glad to be able to do. I don't know what the future holds but what I know is that if i don't do something about my life, it's a dark thought just thinking about it. I thought of getting another degree but in healthcare. The road is tough but this is something i'm willing to take a risk. Financial issues was one of the reason i had to let go of the degree that i was meant to take. I'll worry about that one later but for now, i have future to seize!

My days at the healthcare facility are numbered... the more i try to resist everything, the harder it was for me to feel to let go. I'm in love with everything about healthcare and i'm glad to be able to experience first hand just about everything. I'll never stop learning. InShaaAllah, One day, if it's the will of Allah, i will return...  not as a patient though, but as a worker. That's the dream... Amin...

Please pray that may all goes well for me....

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